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Joseph had a dream. When he told it to his brothers—the very people he thought would be excited for him—they hated him. Not just a little bit, but all the more. This is where our journey begins: having a dream is not enough. What matters is your ability to read the room.
Reading the room is the relationship between your soul and your surroundings. It's possible to have the right thing too soon, to be in the right room with the wrong soul.
Over ten years ago, God promoted me to a place in leadership at Rock City Church. I was excited, ready to lead. But I didn't understand something critical: I was promoted in position, working closely with the senior pastor, yet I got frustrated because I felt I wasn't getting the attention I needed.
Then the Lord showed me the real question: Do we want attention or assistance? Do we want to serve or do we want to be seen?
Because I wasn't getting that attention, I got offended. I was big mad. I left the church and decided to do ministry my own way. It took ten years of a healing process to understand what was really happening. What I was calling abandonment in one season was actually a compliment in the next. My leader said, "You didn't need that much of my attention because you had my trust."
Let me say that again: You have competence and skill. You don't need my attention. You have my trust.
Some of you might feel frustrated and forsaken by God when God has actually said, "You don't need a lot of my attention right now because you have my trust. I've seen you be faithful over a few things. Now I'm ready to trust you with many things."
Be careful when you have a gift but you're insecure. Be careful when you have the gift to get in the room, but you lack the character to stay in the room. Your gift will make room for you to get in, but your character will make room for you to stay in.
Position is where you are. Posture is how you are where you are. Position means you're at church hearing a word. But posture is: are you mad because a different pastor is preaching?
Did you come for a man or did you come for a message? Some of us need to mature beyond only wanting to hear one person. Whoever God wants to speak through, we should say, "I receive whatever you have to say over my life."
Even Jesus shows us the importance of reading rooms. He died to be our Savior, but he lived to be our example. Many of us limit him to only being our Savior, but we don't allow him to also be our example.
In Matthew 26:23, Jesus said, "The one who has dipped his hand into the bowl with me will betray me." In other words: I know you with me, but I also know you not for me.
It's one thing to be surrounded. It's another thing to be supported. It's one thing to be in the same place. It's another thing to be on the same page.
Write this down: Just because they're at your table does not mean they're on your team. Stop getting in your feelings when people at your table are fronting like they're on your team. The Bible says God will prepare a table in the presence of your enemies. So stop pushing people away. Sometimes the consequence of them being a Judas is them watching you eat.
You may not be with me, but you will watch me. You won't stop the favor that God has for me. I know you didn't like the post, but you're watching it. I know you've been talking behind my back, but you're watching me.
Here's where I grieve with so many believers: we are not reading the room. Jesus looked at Judas at the table and he did not ghost him. He called him out. He said, "I know you're dipping in my bowl, sitting at my table with your trifling self. But I want to be clear, you will betray me."
Most of the time we only limit betrayal to pain. But if Jesus never got betrayed, he would have never fulfilled his purpose. It wasn't a friend that kissed Jesus and pushed him to the cross. It was an enemy that betrayed him and pushed him to the cross.
Jesus wasn't surprised because he saw the signs. Be careful when you're single and blind dating—so infatuated with what you want that you keep ignoring the signs. Be careful when you've been faithful for so long, believing God, doing it by yourself, that you just settle for being accepted by anybody while ignoring the signs.
Write this down: Reading the room bridges the gap between observation and opportunity. This is the difference between being able to see it and being able to seize it.
Moses was able to see the promised land, but he was never able to seize it because he could not close the gap with reading the room. He fought to keep the wrong people in his life when God was trying to remove him. Sometimes you cannot end up at the right place holding on to the wrong people.
God will allow you to observe it for a season to show you what's possible, but he will also allow you to live on whatever level your faith settles for. I don't want to come out of another year just seeing what God wants to do in my life. I want to seize it.
If you see it, go and get it. You may not have the credit score, but go put your feet on it. Go pray about it. Go fast about it. Go prepare for it. Stop waiting on God to give you what he's waiting on you to go and pursue.
Reading the room is about looking inward and outward to learn how to effectively maximize moments, seasons, and opportunities. In other words, increase your discernment. It's a sad thing to be saved but can't see.
Joseph had favor, but he couldn't see that favor attracted jealousy. When you lack discernment, you will become a prisoner of either being naive or narcissistic. You'll either believe anything from anybody—overly trusting—or you'll be prideful, thinking it's all about you.
Discernment is your defense against deception. When I lack discernment, I'm easily open to deception. The worst part about being deceived is you don't know you're being deceived.
One of the benefits of reading the room is being able to discern the difference between God's plan and your preference. God's plan is what he wants. My preference is what I want.
Just because God is taking you the long way does not mean you're going the wrong way. Sometimes he has to take you the long way to get some things out of you that you don't take with you when you get where he needs you to be.
He needs you to have a loving heart but also be strong enough to set boundaries. If he gets you in the palace but you're still a people pleaser, you'll give the wrong people the right access.
Sometimes maturity says, "I love you. I trust you, but I don't trust who you trust." Sometimes maturity says, "I love you and I trust you, but I don't trust who you trust with this information."
David dealt with this. Jesus dealt with this. In our text today, Joseph deals with this. Write this down: Just because they're in your family does not mean that they can handle your favor.
Joseph doesn't know the pain of favor until he has to walk in favor without his family. What do you do when the favor on you turns your family against you?
Joseph has favor from his father. His father makes him a special, colorful coat. But while his brothers are in the field working, Joseph is chilling with the father. This unhealthy parenting practice creates generational cycles, because what feels like favor for one also feels like rejection for everybody else.
Can you be real? Anybody know what it's like to not be the favorite in the family? There was a season I was the favorite. Right now, it's not my season. Pastor Mike got the favor. When he walks in the house, the whole family lights up. When I walk in, I need to go to therapy.
His brothers are jealous because what feels like favor for one feels like rejection by others. For some of us, our pain isn't public pain. We're struggling because of private pain. Because you cannot heal if you're always keeping it all in.
The text says Joseph comes walking in the field to give his brothers instructions. Here's what I love about the text: they saw him coming from a distance. So they began to plot to kill him.
You're not being attacked based on where you are now. What if you're being attacked because the enemy sees where you're going next? Some of you are confused about the attacks on your life, but it's because you're on your way.
You may not be where you want to be, but you're not where you used to be. Give God an "on my way" praise. You're on your way to a breakthrough. You're on your way to overflow.
They stripped him of his coat. Just because they take the coat does not mean they took the favor. You can have the coat, but you can't take my favor. You can have the job, but the job didn't give me favor. You can have the stuff, but the stuff didn't give me favor.
This favor that I have, the world didn't give it to me, and the world can't take it away. So if you want to leave, leave. But I'm keeping my favor with me.
I have to give you balanced teaching: Joseph goes to his brothers and he lacks the ability to read the room. He's sharing a dream with people who want to kill him.
Just because you have favor does not mean you also have maturity. Nothing is wrong with the coat. The problem is how you're wearing it. Nothing is wrong with the favor on your life, but how are you wearing it? There's a thin line between being blessed and bragging.
When you have maturity, you also have wisdom. Wisdom shows you that when you have favor, it can become a trigger for people who don't. This is what happened with Saul when they sang, "Saul has killed his thousands, but David his ten thousands." David's success became a trigger for Saul's insecurity.
What is your favor triggering in people around you? If God were to bless you with everything you wanted today, who could you call and celebrate it with?
We often overemphasize who will ride with us when we're down. But we underemphasize who can handle us when we're up. Just because they were with you in your low seasons does not mean they can handle you in your up seasons.
They strip him of his coat and throw him in a pit. A pit is a low place. A dark place. "What did I do to get thrown in here? I was just living right. But have you ever felt like the more you live right, the more life went wrong?"
He's getting thrown in the pit because of the favor on his life. He has a dream and his own brothers threw him in the pit. A pit means going lower than where you were. In other words, they had to pull him down to their level.
Be careful when you're calling certain people friend. They're not a partner, they're a puller. The moment they came into your life, they didn't allow you to push forward. They made you come down.
This is the first season: learning to discern in the dark. Here's the critical truth: God did not cause him to be thrown in the pit, but he did allow him to be thrown in the pit. If he allowed it, it may be because he wants to use it.
He may not have called you being fired from your job, but what if he wants to use you being fired from that job? He may not have caused the betrayal, but what if he wants to use the betrayal? He may not have caused the breakup, but what if he wants to use the breakup?
Romans 8:28 says, "And we know God causes all things to work together for the good of them who are called according to his purpose." So even though it's not all good, he can still use what's all bad.
God did not cause Joseph to be thrown in the pit, but he did allow it. If he allowed it, it may be because he wants to use it. He may not have called you being fired from your job, but what if he wants to use you being fired from that job? He may not have caused the betrayal, but what if he wants to use the betrayal? He may not have caused the breakup, but what if he wants to use the breakup?
And we know God causes all things to work together for the good of them who are called according to his purpose.
So even though it's not all good, he can still use what's all bad. They threw him in a pit, and the text says it had no water in it. I'm glad that I serve a God that will protect me before I get to an attack. While most people are shouting that he got out, I learned how to shout that there was no water in the well—because he should have drowned in what God kept him in.
The pit spells out P-I-T: Purpose In Training. Some of us are calling stuff trouble in one season when God is saying, "You're not in trouble, you're in training." He's developing your ability to discern in the dark, to develop your insight. As long as you're not in a dark place, you'll lean and depend on your natural eyes. But God needs to develop your spiritual eyes. What he wants to do in your life won't make sense to your natural eyes. You need to learn how to tap into your spiritual eyes. While other people see an obstacle, God needs you to be able to see an opportunity.
When his brothers said, "Let's just kill him in the pit," one brother out of twelve spoke up. His brother Judah said, "Let's pull him out." Judah means praise. So when Joseph was in the lowest place in life, praise was his ladder to get him out. When you're in the pit, praise is all you need until praise is all you have. Sometimes you don't realize that praise is all you need until praise is all you have.
Praise is a form of reading the room because the Bible says God inhabits the praises of his people. When you're praising God, you're making a declaration that you don't feel the presence of God here. But when you praise him, you make God feel at home. And when God shows up, he also shows out. If you need him to show up in your house, in your health, in a sick room, in the courtroom—praise him right now. Because when he shows up, he's about to show out.
I remember when I was younger, I used to sit in the back of church and say, "It don't take all of that." Then life hit me. I went through some stuff money couldn't fix, my family couldn't fix, my resources and connections couldn't fix, and I learned how to release a hallelujah. I began to lift up my hands and realized that my lifted hands was a prophetic sign of victory. Praise saved Joseph's life. And if praise could do that for Joseph, what can praise do for you?
Joseph leaves the pit and gets sold into slavery to a man named Potiphar. Potiphar looks at him and says, "There's something special about you. I know you're my slave, but I want to put you over my whole estate." Favor is not predicated on position. In bondage, he had favor.
In the pit, he had to learn how to discern in the dark. In Potiphar's house, he had to learn how to discern in drama because he passed the pit test. But can you pass Potiphar's wife test? The pit represents training. Potiphar's wife represents temptation. Even though Joseph is in a position where he has power, what if Potiphar's wife was there for God to see if he could trust him in the palace and not abuse the power that he trusted him with?
Potiphar's wife is attracted to Joseph. She tries to make him lay with her. He says no. "I cannot dishonor my God and your husband by laying with you." He runs away. She strips off his coat. His brothers stripped off his first coat. He looks up in another season and God gives him another coat. I dare somebody shout another way. They tried to take your last job, but God gave you another. They tried to take your joy in the last season, but God gave you another. They tried to backstab you from getting a promotion, but God gave you another. They tried to take your last house, but God gave you another. Somebody shout, "Another one!"
You can take the coat, but you cannot take the favor. Joseph reads the room while he's excited about the promotion at Potiphar's house. Never confuse the promotion with the promise. Sometimes the enemy will tempt you with getting comfortable with promotion. When God is saying, "No, this is just training for the promise that I have for you. If I can trust you with Potiphar's estate, I can trust you to run a whole nation."
She lies on him and says he tried to take advantage of her. Potiphar has him thrown in prison.
So we have four seasons of a dream. Number one: he has to learn how to discern in the dark—the pit. Number two: he has to learn how to discern in drama—Potiphar's house. Number three: he had to learn how to discern in debt. What do you do when you have a dream while you're in debt? What do you do when you have a million-dollar dream on a negative budget?
He's in jail and he's probably saying, "God, the dream you showed me—I don't see a way out of this. It feels impossible." But I'm so glad that I serve the God of the impossible. Prison doors cannot block his favor.
He develops insight in the pit. Integrity in Potiphar's house. Integrity is a gift that God gives us to protect us from self-sabotage. It's one thing to be burned by other people, but what do you do when you keep burning yourself? In prison, God wants to develop influence. Because he's in prison and in debt, he's not going to have the resources he needs. But God can give him influence with the right people who do.
Everybody does not have to like you—just the right person. You may not have the money, but God's favor is not limited by money. Some people are so broke all they have is money. The worst type of poverty is spiritual poverty. Jesus said, "What does it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his soul?"
Here he is in prison and God gives him influence to run the whole prison. In the pit he has favor. In Potiphar's house he has favor. In prison he has favor. Two prisoners, one a cup bearer and one a baker, have dreams and try to understand what they mean. He interprets the dreams. He tells one what it means—not good. He tells the other what it means. But he says to them, "Because of this, you're going to get out of here. You're going to have audience with the king Pharaoh. Remember me. That's all I ask. When you get out, just put my name in his ear. Look out for your boy."
They get out of prison and they forget about him. Until Pharaoh has a dream. And the only person who can interpret dreams is Joseph. God will set up seasons where a solution that can only be solved can only be solved by you. For some of us, we need to stop looking for other people to answer problems because you're the answer. God, in this season, make me an answer. I don't just want to pray for answers. Make me an answer.
When we first meet Joseph, he's dreaming dreams. Now he's matured to not only dreaming dreams, but now he's interpreting dreams. His gift was dreaming dreams, but his growth led to interpreting dreams. Your gift says a lot about God. Your growth says a lot about you. His gift got him in the pit, but his growth got him into the palace. Be careful when you're gifted but not growing. It was his growth that got him out, not his gift.
I know I'm gifted to dream, but God, show me what I need to focus on growing in. I don't want to always be gifted in one place and be limited to only being used one way.
Pharaoh has a dream and the people whose dream Joseph interpreted in prison say, "I know a man that when I had a dream in prison, he told me what it meant." They bring him out. Now he's in the palace. He interprets the dream. Pharaoh puts him over the entire country's economy and a famine hits the land. And guess who comes looking for food? His brothers—the same people who threw him in the pit came looking for help.
The problem is he recognized them, but they couldn't recognize him. Some people who were in your past seasons are going to come back and not recognize you because you're not going to look like what you've been through. Do I have anybody in the room that can say, "I've been through some stuff, but the stuff didn't wilt me out. I did get better"? Somebody shout, "I got better!" As a matter of fact, I look better. I'm believing better. I'm living better.
The discerning of the dark, discerning drama, discerning debt—it's influence, not fame. Fame is what you get when people know you. Influence is what you get when people believe you. Number four: he had to discern in destiny. When you get in destiny, God wants to detox your indifference.
The process of becoming who God has called you to be means you experience wounds. You have a series of cuts. Sometimes it could be from family members, friends, and you can become indifferent or stop caring about people the way you used to care. It's what certain psychologists call compassion fatigue. What do you do when you've been there for everybody and nobody has been there for you?
God is having to deal with Joseph in the palace and says, "Yes, I have you in the palace. But don't forget why I put you there. I gave you a dream for you to be a blessing to your family. I know what your family did hurt. But I've given you favor in every season of your life. Don't allow unforgiveness to block it."
Family shows up. Joseph goes into another room and the text says he wept bitterly. He wept so much that people down the street could hear him weeping. Do I have anybody in the room that's ever been hurt so bad that there was a cry that only God can describe?
But he comes back out after letting out what he needed to get out. He looks them in the face and says, "What the enemy meant for evil, God used it for my good." Do I have anybody right now at the end of this message that can look back over your life and say, "What the enemy meant to kill me? God used to build me"? It didn't take you out, it didn't make you bitter, but it made you better.
Joseph said what many of us struggle with: "I forgive you." Because you cannot have favor without forgiveness. And if you look at Joseph, the greater the favor, the deeper the forgiveness. Some of us are living under a closed heaven. Not because you're evil, but because your heart is closed. You have unforgiveness in your heart. When you have unforgiveness, your prayer is not even hitting the ceiling.
Do you consider the blood of Jesus as full repayment for whatever they did to you? Because what Joseph did for his brothers, Jesus did for us. See the gospel.
It's one thing to have relationship, but it's another level to have fellowship. It's like being married but separated—just related by title only. God is saying, "Enough of you doing for me. When are you going to be with me? Why are you so busy doing the work of the Lord but abandoning the Lord of the work?"
When was the last time you sat in his presence and not in a rush to get to what you needed to do next? When was the last time you talked to him not about what you wanted, but just being thankful for who he is? How would you feel if the people you love only talked to you when they needed you?
Last year during pollen season, my sinuses were acting up and I was blaming it on the pollen. My doctor said, "When was the last time you changed your filters?" I went and looked at the filter and was embarrassed. He said, "Yes, the filter, because it hasn't been cleaned or changed, is triggering some of your allergies."
I had to change the filter in my house, but what if you need to change the filter in your heart? What is the wrong filter triggering out of you? Is it triggering you being easily offended, hyper-sensitive, self-dependent? Before you can discern who's right for you, you might need to discern what's wrong with you. Because you may keep being attracted from the wrong place. You said you got to tighten. No, your trauma got to tighten.
Discernment is not just about hearing from God, but also about applying God's truth. Jesus said, "You will know a tree by the fruit that it bears." With some people, some places, some rooms, it may have borne fruit in one season, but that doesn't mean that's the only time you expect the fruit. Sometimes some people aren't bad. The season might have changed.
Your destiny is too important to be lost by poor discernment. Every season of Joseph's life represented a different room. Even when you see Jesus, we shout over the seven last sayings of him on the cross. But I've learned how to shout over his silence when they marched him from judgment hall to judgment hall because silence is a strategy. Sometimes the best response is no response. He showed us how to read the room.
