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Part 7 of 16
A Cloud Of Witnesses
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The book of Ruth comes right after Judges, a time when the people did whatever seemed right in their own eyes. When a culture ignores God's word and operates by this standard, things degrade to the lowest common denominator. You find oppression, violence, and injustice. The people would be oppressed by enemies until God raised up a judge—actually a military leader—to liberate them. This cycle would repeat: a period of peace, followed by people doing whatever seemed right, leading to oppression and a cry to God.
The book of Judges contains some genuinely dark stories. By the time you reach Ruth, it feels like a refreshing change of pace—almost like a Hallmark movie after pages of tragedy.
Consider the setup: Naomi is a heartbroken woman who leaves the big city after losing everything and moves to a small town to start over. Ruth is a loyal younger woman who quits her old life. Together they arrive in a charming small town where everybody knows everybody. They meet Boaz, the surprisingly handsome farmer, who takes an interest in Ruth. The matchmaking ensues with an adorably awkward first meeting, wise advice from the widow, a crucial romantic scene under the stars, a plot twist with a new suitor and legal complications, and finally a beautiful wedding where the whole town celebrates.
Ruth 1:1-2 tells us: "In the days when the judges ruled, there was a famine in the land. So a man from Bethlehem and Judah together with his wife and two sons went to live for a while in the country of Moab."
Bethlehem is familiar to us—it's where Jesus was born and where King David was born. But Moab requires context. When the Israelites read that someone was going to Moab, it evoked memories and emotions much like how we feel when we hear "9/11" or "Pearl Harbor." These weren't just geographical references; they shaped the psyche of a generation.
As the Israelites traveled from Egypt toward the promised land, they came upon Moab hungry and thirsty. Moab refused to give them food and water—even refused to sell it to them. This was a major breach of hospitality, but more than that, Moab had it in for Israel.
When Moab couldn't stop Israel through denial, they escalated. The king of Moab hired what we might call a sorcerer for hire and paid him to curse the Israelites. When that failed, they shifted tactics: "If we can't curse them, what if we could corrupt them?" So they involved Moabitete women to seduce Israelite men into sexual immorality and pagan worship. This ignited God's wrath, a plague broke out, and 24,000 Israelites were killed in a single day. It was a national tragedy.
So when someone in this culture reads that a family from Bethlehem ("the house of bread") was leaving during a famine to go to Moab, it raises an eyebrow. This is not a casual move.
In Ruth 1, Naomi's husband Elimelech dies, and after about ten years, both her sons die as well. She is left with nothing. In an agrarian culture, men work the land and provide income and food. If your husband dies, you hope you have sons—they will inherit the land, work it, and care for you in your old age. But if you lose your husband and your sons, you have lost everything.
As a woman, Naomi had no legal right to the land and no means of income, support, or food. Being a widow in the ancient Near East was one of the most vulnerable positions one could be in—no legal standing apart from a male family member, no way to perpetuate your family line, at risk of poverty and exploitation. This is why the Mosaic law consistently instructed the Israelites to care for the widow, the orphan, and the foreigner.
When Naomi returns to Bethlehem, the people greet her saying, "It's Naomi!" But she responds, "Don't call me Naomi. Call me Mara." Her name Naomi meant pleasant, but Mara means bitter. She said, "The Almighty has made my life very bitter. I left full and I returned empty and bitter."
She had good reason to feel this way. Not only was she grieving the loss of her husband and sons, but her entire world had collapsed—her economic security, her social standing, her legal rights. Everything was gone.
As Naomi prepares to return to Bethlehem, her two daughters-in-law, Orpa and Ruth, want to go with her. They love her. But Naomi strenuously objects: "No, ladies, I don't have a husband. I don't have a son. I don't have income. I don't have land security. I don't have a guaranteed future. I'm going back to my homeland to live on the very edge of survival. Don't hitch your wagon to me."
Orpa decides to stay, but Ruth insists on coming. Listen to what she says in Ruth 1:16:
"Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Wherever you go, I will go. Where you stay, I will stay. Your people will be my people. And your God will be my God."
Ruth is willing to leave what she knows to follow God into the unknown.
What makes Ruth willing to do this? Naomi is the catalyst. Ruth has had a front-row seat to seeing how Naomi lives out her relationship with God. Something about the way she lives out that relationship makes Ruth say, "I want that."
Have you ever had somebody in your life—a mother, a father, a pastor, a friend, a mentor—whose way of living out their relationship with God made you say, "Oh my goodness, I want what they've got"? That's what Ruth saw in Naomi.
After college, I drifted in my faith spiritually. But when I got involved in a young adults group at a local church, something shifted. There was something about seeing people my own age who were authentic in their pursuit of God. They were real. It was transformative. It made me willing to leave some things behind to be all-in with this faith because I wanted what I saw in them. It catapulted my faith and changed the direction and course of my life.
Ruth was willing to leave more than just a place. She was leaving the land of Moab and, with it, her national deity, Kimosh. In the Old Testament, each land had a deity tied to it. If you were a Moabitete, you were by definition a Kimosh worshipper. You participated in offerings, rituals, and incantations.
This is hard for us in our modern culture to contextualize. But think of it like this: what they were doing was trying to control and manipulate their environment to get their needs and wants met. In an agrarian society, they needed rain for crops. So the whole deal with these gods was: if we do the right mix of incantations and sacrifices, we'll compel this god to give us rain, which gives us what we need and want.
We do a version of this. Whether it's love, acceptance, wealth, success, or possessions, we have a pattern of sacrificing way too much to attempt to control and manipulate our environment to get our needs and wants met. Any time we take something—even a good thing—and elevate it above God, we turn that thing into an idol.
Ruth was willing to leave things behind. But she was also willing to trust God enough to follow him into the unknown.
When she says, "Your God will be my God," I hear a person making a personal decision. There's a difference between I believe in God and I have made him my God. That's the moment when it becomes personal.
This kind of decision is not private. The very first thing God asks us to do after saying, "God, I'll do whatever you ask" is to get baptized—a public expression of faith. Why? Because God knows that to live out this walk with him, we are going to need people—brothers and sisters in Christ—to encourage and support us along the way.
Notice what Ruth says: "Your people will be my people. Your God will be my God."
Do you have your people? Do you have people in your life who can speak truth into your life—people you've given permission to, and who have your permission to speak truth? People who know you well enough to understand what's really going on? People you do life with, people you trust, people who follow God together with you and encourage one another?
It's possible to say, "Yeah, I have my church, but I don't have my people." Listen, if you have your church and you don't have your people, you only have half the church. We want to help you find the other half.
This is why we invest so much energy in creating environments like small groups and life groups. We have life groups meeting every night of the week across all our campuses. We have SOAP Bible studies meeting on multiple mornings a week on most campuses. We have a re-engaged marriage small group meeting every Tuesday night from 6:30 to 8:30 with childcare. We have monthly gatherings: Valor for men, That Girl for women, and Grace Marriage for couples. We do all of this because you need your people for your spiritual growth.
Ruth goes to a field to gather leftover grain so she and Naomi can eat. She ends up in the field of Boaz. When Boaz learns who she is, he says, "Listen. You can stay in this field as long as you like. I've already told the men to leave you alone. You can have all the water you like."
Ruth responds in Ruth 2:10:
"Why have I found such favor in your eyes that you notice me, a foreigner?"
Boaz notices her character and reputation first. Listen to what he says:
"I've been told all about what you've done for your mother-in-law since the death of your husband, and how you left your father and mother and your homeland and came to live with a people you did not know before. May the Lord repay you for what you have done. May you be richly rewarded by the Lord, the God of Israel, under whose wings you have come to take refuge."
There are principles here about the kind of person you'd want to pick for a relationship or marriage.
First, decide in advance what you want in a spouse and what type of person you allow yourself to be attracted to. Before my wife and I started dating, she created a list of character traits she wanted in a husband. She was a single mom and she was focused. Our first date felt like a job interview. Her first question: "Where do you see yourself in five years?" Followed by, "Where do you see yourself in ten years?" And then, "I noticed you said you might be married. What kind of woman would you look for in a wife?" This woman was intense. It was honestly endearing. I appreciated that she wasn't willing to settle.
Second, when you start dating, consider these questions: How do they treat people who have no way to benefit them? How do they treat the waiters in a restaurant? How do they interact in different relationships in their life—with co-workers, parents, kids if they have them, friends, neighbors, even their exes? Look at the patterns. Look at what all of that looks like together.
Think about what Boaz offers Ruth. He notices her character. He sees how she cares for Naomi. He sees her integrity. He sees her faith. He's not noticing her looks first; he's noticing her character.
When you're looking for someone, focus on character over chemistry. Chemistry fades. Character remains. A person of good character will treat you well, will love God, will care about others, and will be someone you can trust with your life.
Look for someone who is already the kind of person you want them to be—not someone you hope will change or become. Don't marry a project.
Look for these qualities: a provider who can take care of himself and eventually a family; a protector who will stand up for what's right and protect those he loves; a pursuer who takes initiative in the relationship; and an initiator who doesn't wait for things to happen but makes things happen.
When evaluating potential romantic partners, there are concrete things to look for. How do they treat people who have no way to benefit them? Watch how they treat waiters in a restaurant or others in service roles. This reveals their true character when no advantage is gained.
Look at how they interact across different relationships in their life—with co-workers, parents, kids if they have them, friends, neighbors, and even their exes. Is there congruency? Does the same person show up in all these contexts, or do they change depending on who's around?
Follow the 90-day rule: don't let your heart get attached until 90 days have passed. This timeframe serves several purposes. It gives enough time to see if words and actions match. It creates space to observe how they respond when disappointed or frustrated. It allows you to determine whether their private life and public life are similar.
Patterns take time to emerge, and patterns are a far better indicator than promises. Businesses use 90-day probation periods for a reason—anyone can maintain a facade for about three months, but eventually true colors show up. You don't want your heart attached and your judgment clouded before you've truly seen what's there.
If you want a God-centered marriage one day, look for and only date somebody who has God in the center of their life right now. Don't settle for someone merely willing to go to church with you. Seek someone who says, "I want to be in church because those are my people." They already possess an active, living faith.
How you manage your relationship before marriage from a physical intimacy standpoint matters profoundly. The Bible calls us to abstain from sex until marriage. While culture calls this foolishness, consider this: in a God-centered marriage, you and your spouse will face many decisions where you must choose between what God wants and what you want.
Physical intimacy is one of the first things God gives you as a couple to steward together. Make the decision to do it the right way. Set a precedent: "For me and my house, we are going to follow God in this." This establishes a pattern of obedience that carries forward throughout your marriage.
Boaz demonstrates four critical qualities that should be present in a godly spouse:
Provider: He can take care of himself and eventually a family. Boaz provides for Ruth by instructing his workers to drop extra grain for her to gather.
Protector: He stands up for what's right and protects those he loves. Boaz protects Ruth physically in a dangerous environment where widows were vulnerable. He also protects her reputation and her purity. When they find themselves in a compromising position, he doesn't let things go too far. He is proactive in his protection, not passive.
Pursuer: He pursues her heart with intentionality. Everyone pursues their love interest when dating—writing love notes, going to flower shows, doing whatever their beloved wants. But this intentionality must continue after marriage. An intentional marriage is a healthy marriage. Don't stop pursuing your spouse's heart once you're married.
Initiator: He doesn't wait for things to happen; he makes things happen. This especially relates to spiritual leadership. As Dr. David Stoop taught, spiritual leadership in marriage isn't about dominance or "one up, one down" thinking where the husband demands obedience.
Instead, biblical spiritual leadership is substitute leadership—it means being the spiritual initiator in your family. It's rejecting passivity. The spiritual initiator says things like: "Hey, I think we need to find our people. Why don't we check out a group?" or "Let's carve out time for us—just you and me for couple devotionals." This person takes the lead in spiritual matters, not through control but through initiative and invitation.
Naomi and Ruth's story still has a significant problem to resolve. Naomi remains a widow. Ruth remains a widow. Naomi's deceased husband Elimelech faces the loss of his family line and the family land disappearing forever.
The Old Testament law made provision for exactly this situation: the kinsman redeemer (also called a family guardian in some translations). When circumstances like this arose, a close relative could step in to restore what had been lost. Boaz qualified as close enough to serve as kinsman redeemer.
However, there was a relative even closer in line who had the right of first refusal. When Boaz presents the opportunity to this man, he initially agrees to redeem the land. But when he learns he would also have to marry Ruth the Moabitess, he declines. Boaz eagerly steps in. He redeems the land, marries Ruth, and restores hope to a family that had lost everything.
Naomi's transformation is complete: she begins the story empty and ends it full. Ruth has a husband. A son is born. The family line continues, and that son becomes the grandfather of King David.
In this love story, Boaz is the hero. But in the broader love story of the Bible, Jesus is the hero, and he is our kinsman redeemer. We are spiritually bankrupt, unable to save ourselves. Jesus took on human flesh to become part of our family and to do for us what we could not do for ourselves. He paid the price to redeem us.
Consider the parallels:
This is the heart of the gospel message woven through the story of Ruth.
