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Recently I saw a man at the gym ego lift. I should have been helping, but I couldn't stop staring. He loaded three 45-pound plates on either side of the barbell, clapped his hands twice (I don't know why), and then laid down underneath the bar with no spotter. He attempted to lower that weight to his chest and lift it back to the sky. I'm here to tell you that the weight made its way down, but it did not make its way back up.
And I wondered, where did he get the confidence to believe he could lift that kind of weight?
Ego lifting is when you believe you can lift a weight that's beyond your ability. And I'm not the only one who's ever seen it — we've all seen it, because we all do it.
We live in a world that puts impossible standards on the bar and then tells you to lay down and lift it. We live in a world that constantly makes you feel like you're not enough — not pretty enough, not rich enough, not strong enough, not intelligent enough, not powerful enough. And the only thing the world can tell you as you lay underneath that impossible weight is to believe in yourself.
But what if believing in yourself is not enough?
The great American philosopher Tina Fey once said that confidence is 10% hard work and 90% delusion. In other words, when you know you're not enough, just delude yourself into believing that you are. So clap your hands and lay down under that bar.
But hear me this morning: there will always come a moment when delusion meets reality. There are some things in life that, try as you might, believing in yourself cannot accomplish.
I'm a 5'5" adult male — and I say that with pride. Shout out to my short kings out there. But I don't care how much delusion I can muster, I'm not playing in the NFL. I'm not playing in the NBA. It isn't happening. Delusion can make me try, but when my delusion-based confidence meets reality, I end up more insecure than I was before.
Everyone is on a search for confidence, and most people never truly find it because they're looking in the wrong place. You will never find true confidence by looking inside yourself. Why? Because you are not enough for everything life could possibly throw at you.
But what if I told you that's okay? Your "you-are-enoughness" was never meant to be found by believing in yourself.
In 1 Samuel 10 and 11, we see a man named Saul laying under a bar he cannot possibly lift — and the weights were placed on that bar by God himself.
Back in 1 Samuel 8, Israel demanded a king to be like the other nations. In their request for a king, they were rejecting God, who was already their king. In response, God chooses Saul to rule over Israel. And let me tell you, that crown was a weight too heavy for Saul.
But here's what I want you to know: God's choice of Saul wasn't a petty choice. It wasn't God saying, "Here's your king — now I'll step aside and let you watch him struggle."
God wasn't like me at the pool with my two-year-old last weekend. I was holding him in water too deep for him, and for some reason he tried to push away from me and said, "Daddy, I can swim. Let me go." So you know what I did? I dropped him. He dropped like a rock. Now, I immediately picked him back up, I promise — coughing, snot everywhere. And I told him, "See what happened when I let you go? Hold on to me." Happy Father's Day, y'all.
But that's not God here. Even though the people are resisting God as their king, he does not let them go. Catch what God says to Samuel in chapter 9:
"Tomorrow, about this time, I will send to you a man from the land of Benjamin, and you shall anoint him to be prince over the people of Israel. He shall save my people from the hand of the Philistines. For I have seen my people, because their cry has come to me."
These people said to God, "We don't need you. We can swim on our own." And I'm glad God is not like me. He never let Israel go. He gives them a king who will save the people. He calls them my people. Why? Because he heard their cry.
Do you see the character of God here? God determined to use the very symbol of Israel's resistance as the tool of their salvation. God declares, "You might not want me, but you can't get rid of me that easily. You are mine."
And if you're in Christ, this is not just Israel's story — it's your story. Before you knew God, you resisted him. You said, "I can swim on my own." You ran in the complete opposite direction. And instead of letting you drown in your own resistance, he pulled you close and said, "You are mine. I'm not letting you go." You tried to run away from him, and yet he ran toward you in mercy.
God raises up Saul to rule over his people and save them. But there are clues in chapter 10 that Saul, while physically impressive, is too small for the task.
Saul looks the part, but he demonstrates none of the qualities of a king — he's not assertive, decisive, or confident. He drives none of the action in chapters 9 and 10. He's sent by his father to find donkeys. When he's about to give up, it's his servant who says, "Let's go seek out Samuel." It's his servant who provides the gift for Samuel.
And yet God gave Saul enough to be confident anyway. God declared him king through the prophet Samuel and provided three miraculous signs confirming that God knew what he was doing.
In that moment, Saul has a choice. The weight of the crown is heavy. Will he look inward for the confidence he needs, or will he look to God? And the same choice is before you this morning.
Let's read from verse 17:
"Now Samuel called the people together to the Lord at Mizpah... Then Samuel brought all the tribes of Israel near, and the tribe of Benjamin was taken by lot... and Saul, the son of Kish, was taken by lot. But when they sought him, he could not be found... And the Lord said, 'Behold, he has hidden himself among the baggage.' And they ran and took him from there... And Samuel said to all the people, 'Do you see him whom the Lord has chosen?'... And the people shouted, 'Long live the king.'"
Samuel had already declared Saul king privately; now he declares it publicly. He calls the whole nation together and they cast lots. Why go through this process? Because Samuel wanted to show the nation that Saul was God's choice, not his own.
The lot lands on Saul's tribe, then his family, then Saul himself — and Saul is gone. Nobody can find him. God has to tell them, "The king you wanted is hiding in the baggage."
Why did Saul hide? Some think it was humility. I don't think so. Go back to chapter 9. When Samuel reveals God's plan for Saul's life, instead of believing the prophet, watch how Saul responds:
"Am I not a Benjamite, from the least of the tribes of Israel? And is not my clan the humblest of all the clans of the tribe of Benjamin? Why then have you spoken to me in this way?"
Saul expresses insecurity. So picture him standing there as the lots are cast. The lot lands on Benjamin — the least of all the tribes. Then it lands on his clan — the humblest of all the clans. You know what he hears? He hears his own insecurity.
Saul has a choice: respond to what God has called him, or respond to what his insecurity has called him. He turns his insecurities up and turns God's calling down — and he hides.
True confidence comes when you live in response to who God says you are, rather than who you think you are.
Where are you looking for confidence this morning? For too many of you, you're like Saul — looking to yourself. And that will never produce true confidence.
Looking to yourself for confidence will only produce insecurity, anxiety, and despair — and you see that in the life of Saul.
But do you know where you can find true confidence? When your understanding of who you are is rooted in who God has declared you to be. If you trust in Christ, do you know who God has declared you to be?
"But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God." (John 1:12)
You are a child of God. And for too many of us, we refuse to take confidence in that.
Who was the best Disney character? Rafiki, of course. In The Lion King, Simba loses confidence in who he's been declared to be. He's the rightful king, but his dad dies, he gets depressed, and he hides from his calling because he forgets his identity.
What does Rafiki do? He finds Simba and leads him on a journey to remember his identity. There's a scene where Simba is led through a thicket, and he hears the voice of his father — voiced by James Earl Jones, whose voice sounds remarkably like mine — declaring, "Remember who you are. Remember who you are."
Many of you are refusing to live in your calling as a child of God, and the Spirit of God wants to lead you to remember who you are.
If you remember that God has declared you his child:
It's time to live in response to what he has declared about you, rather than what you declare about you.
Let's keep moving to verse 25:
"And Samuel told the people the rights and duties of kingship... Then Samuel sent all the people each one to his home. Saul also went to his home at Gibeah... But some worthless fellows said, 'How can this man save us?' And they despised him and brought him no present. But he held his peace."
Many people point to Saul "holding his peace" as a good thing — as humility in the face of criticism. But I'm not so sure. Here's why.
Something similar happens earlier in the book. The last men called worthless were Eli's sons in 1 Samuel 2 — men who used their authority for selfish ends. And Eli was judged because he did nothing to stop them. Eli holding his peace toward his worthless sons was not a good thing. It was a bad thing.
Something similar is going on here. These worthless men declare that Saul can't save. There's a response Saul could easily have given: "You're right, I can't — but God can." Instead, he says nothing.
Why? Because those men look at Saul and say he's weak — and Saul is thinking the exact same thing about himself. I'm too weak for the task. And that's not humility. That's a lack of faith.
Faithlessness declares, "I'm weak, so God can't use me." Humility declares, "I'm weak, but praise God, he uses weak things."
True confidence comes from trusting in God's ability rather than your own.
King Saul stretches high to the sky and looks impressive, but he's unstable because he's rooted in the shallow soil of insecurity. Many of us are rooted in the same soil, living life faithlessly because we meditate on what we can't do rather than what God can do.
When God declares that you are his child, he's going to call you to do some things that feel impossible simply because you are his child. So where will you look for the strength to do them?
In my formative years, my father was nowhere to be seen. I'm not bashing my dad — I love him, and I believe he tried the best he could with the hand he was dealt. He didn't know the Lord, and there's only so much you can do without him.
But my mom was incredible — full of faith and love. I know the Lord today because of my mother. And yet, as faithful and loving as she was, she couldn't replace my dad. She couldn't teach me how to be a man. I didn't see what a faithful father looked like growing up.
And so God, in his grace, providence, and wisdom, decided to make me the father of three boys. It is easy for me to stare into the faces of these precious image bearers of God and focus on my weakness — that I don't have what it takes, that I don't have a dad who showed me how, that I'm in over my head.
But here's what I love about God: in those moments, he reminds me that he knew my history when he gave me the task. He tells me to stop staring at my weakness and start staring at how big he is — to focus on what I have rather than what I didn't. He reminds me that he's given me his Spirit, his Word, and his promise to supply all my needs. He says, "It's okay that you're weak. But stop meditating on your weakness and start meditating on my power."
Did this man just stand in the pulpit and preach a sermon to himself? I sure did. And now I'll turn around and preach it to you.
As a child of God, he is going to give you things that feel impossible. It's going to feel like he put too much weight on the bar:
In those moments where you feel wholly incapable, do what Saul should have done: stop looking to yourself, and boast in the strength of the Lord.
God supplies the strength for whatever he commands. We can trust him.
We actually see God flex his strength in Saul's life in chapter 11. The Ammonites attack Jabesh, a town in Israel, and Jabesh immediately caves. They go to King Nahash of the Ammonites and ask, "What are your terms for our surrender?"
Catch how little faith is in that question. Why would they believe that a God who rescued them from Egypt would forsake them now?
And Nahash — whose name in Hebrew means serpent (we'll come back to that) — says, "Here are the terms: I'll let you live, but I want to gouge out the right eye of every man in Jabesh."
Savage. But here's the significance. In battle, your left eye was covered by your shield. The only way you could see and fight was through your right eye. By demanding every right eye, Nahash was shaming those men and creating men who could no longer fight — slaves to the Ammonites forever.
The people of Jabesh are desperate, so they go to the rest of Israel for help. Look at verse 5:
"Now behold, Saul was coming from the field behind the oxen. And Saul said, 'What is wrong with the people that they are weeping?' So they told him the news of the men of Jabesh. And the Spirit of God rushed upon Saul when he heard these words, and his anger was greatly kindled."
Saul — this man who looked so impressive but was so weak inside — finally rises to the challenge. He gets angry that God's people are being oppressed. He unites Israel, brings them together, encourages them, and together they defeat the Ammonites.
Where did that come from? Look at verse 6: "The Spirit of the Lord rushed upon Saul."
The Spirit of God moved in a man who had demonstrated very little faith, to save a people who had demonstrated very little faith. Everybody in this situation is helpless and faithless until the Spirit of God moves.
Nobody in this text deserves God's salvation, and God, by his Spirit, grants it anyway. True confidence is ours only by grace alone.
Nobody in this room deserves salvation either. We are like Israel in this text — surrendering to the serpent because we have so little faith and so little hope. We have sinned against a holy God, and we are deserving of destruction. But instead of allowing that, God in his grace sent a king to save — a king far better than Saul ever was. And that king is King Jesus.
Jesus came confident in who God declared him to be. He didn't shrink back. When Jesus was baptized, his Father declared, "This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased." Jesus found his confidence in the words and authority of his Father.
And Jesus didn't hide from his mission. He set his face toward Jerusalem, facing our enemy the serpent all by himself on the cross, winning our victory. He died paying the penalty of our sin in our place, and rose again, crushing the serpent's head — saving us from the tyranny of sin and death. Anyone who places their faith and trust in Jesus can be saved today.
You could have the confidence you've been looking for your entire life. Where do you find it? Not in you. You find it in Christ.
At the end of chapter 11, the people celebrate Saul, and Saul rightly tells everyone the victory came from the Lord. But Saul eventually fails as king. King Saul was not a worthy place to put your confidence — but King Jesus is.
Will you put your confidence in Jesus and Jesus alone?
If you have not trusted in Christ, your confidence is in something that is not as secure as it looks. It's based on a delusion that will soon meet reality. Place your confidence in your looks, your money, your resourcefulness, your family, your intellect — it might feel good for a while, but you're in for a major disappointment.
What I fear for many of you here in the DMV is that your accomplishments have blinded you to the fact that you fall short where it matters most — you fall short of the glory of God. That's a bar you can't lift off your chest. But Christ has come to lift it for you. He died and rose again so you can repent and trust in Jesus alone.
"Okay, Eric, I'm a Christian. What do you have for me?" I have the same question: Are you living with confidence in Christ alone?
For many of you, the question isn't who you have confidence in — you can give the Sunday school answer, "Jesus." Maybe the better question is: What do you have confidence for?
Too many of us are looking for confidence from God to do things we can already do in the flesh.
When I lived with my father, he owned a 1976 Corvette Stingray. It was beautiful, fast, and powerful — but I never really saw him drive it anywhere. He'd wash it on the weekends and drive it around a block with a 15-mph speed limit. He had a Corvette with so much power, and he used it for far too little.
Christian, you have access to the Spirit of God — the same power that raised Christ from the dead — dwelling in you. But for far too many of us, all our prayers and efforts are aimed at the Spirit giving us confidence to live the American dream.
The American dream — a house, kids, a spouse — is not a bad thing. It's a small thing. That's too little weight on the bar. You don't need the Spirit of God to be successful at your career, to own a nice home, to get married, or to procreate — plenty of people who don't have the Spirit do those things.
Don't you want to experience God's power in your life? Don't you want to spend your life accomplishing things that will outlive you and last for eternity?
And it's too big for you. That bar is on your chest and you can't lift it — but praise God he's given you the strength by his Spirit to get it off.
"His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness." (2 Peter 1:3)
God is calling you to live a life bigger than you. Do you feel like you're not enough? Good. Welcome to the club. God is able to meet you in your insufficiency with his strength and sufficiency.
It's time to believe what God has said about you: you are a child of God. It's time to trust in his power and not our own. And it's time to rest in his grace.
Father, I pray you will give us the heart of that old hymn writer who said: "This is all my hope and peace, nothing but the blood of Jesus. This is all my righteousness, nothing but the blood of Jesus." Help us to be confident in you. On Christ the solid rock we stand; all other ground is sinking sand.
Forgive us for finding our confidence in the places the world tells us to. For those finding their confidence in places other than you and the work of your Son, shift the foundations beneath their feet — and help them see that this is not you being mean, but you being kind, revealing that there is no security in the things of this world.
Our security, our righteousness, our identity — all that we are is found in Christ alone. Help us depend on you. Make us confident people, knowing that regardless of what happens, we are held in the palm of your sovereign hand, and you will work all things for the good of those who love you and are called according to your purpose. I pray these things in the matchless name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
