Trusting the Good Shepherd

Trusting the Good Shepherd

The Pursuit of Happiness and Freedom

Research shows us something fascinating about human happiness across different life stages. Studies consistently reveal that people between ages 65 and 74 report the highest average happiness levels. Why? It's not because of their circumstances—it's because of how they view life.

There's a clear U-shaped curve in happiness data. We start life fairly happy as children, then happiness declines through our teenage years, continuing downward until around age 45. After that, the curve rises again, peaking between 65 and 74. The driving factor behind this shift isn't retirement or financial security—it's freedom from the opinions of others.

A Stanford Center on Longevity study calls this the socioemotional selectivity theory. When people are younger and feel like life stretches endlessly ahead, they prioritize achievement, exploration, status, and career building. But as people age, they often become more selective, investing in meaningful relationships, emotionally satisfying experiences, peace, gratitude, and what truly matters. They stop living for other people's approval.

What If We Didn't Have to Wait?

Here's the real question: What if we didn't have to wait until our 70s to experience that freedom? What if Psalm 23 could show us the path to live with that perspective right now—free from striving, free from the need to accomplish enough to be valued by others?

The Shepherd's Guidance

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake. (Psalm 23:1-3)

Psalm 23 shows us four categories of life:

1. The Normal Place — green pastures and still waters, the majority of our life
2. The Fearful Place — walking through the valley of the shadow of death
3. The Dangerous Place — being in the presence of enemies
4. The Abiding Place — dwelling in the house of the Lord forever

But here's what's crucial: Psalm 23 isn't just about what the shepherd gives us. It's about where and how the shepherd leads us. We follow because we trust the shepherd.

The Nature of Biblical Rest

When the psalmist speaks of lying down in green pastures, we often think of rest as simply stopping—as doing nothing. But biblical rest is not about stopping; it's about trust. Biblical rest is the soul's settled trust in God.

A sheep lies down only when it fully trusts the shepherd. The green pastures matter less than the shepherd's promise of safety. When the Bible talks about rest, it's not doing nothing—it's trusting someone.

We live in a culture obsessed with busyness. Upwards of 80% of people say they're busy, as if busyness proves importance. Yet when people try to address this exhaustion through passive activities—watching television, scrolling, numbing out—studies show these activities feel enjoyable in the moment (rated an 8 on a 10-point enjoyment scale) but don't actually restore the soul. In fact, people who watch the most television are consistently the least happy.

Why? Because these activities don't address the root issue: we're striving to win approval from people instead of resting in God's love.

The Problem of Misplaced Trust

Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a German theologian who resisted Hitler during World War II, wrote something profound:

"The primary way to define sin is not just the doing of bad things, but the making of good things into ultimate things. It is seeking to establish a sense of self by making something else more central to your significance, purpose, and happiness than your relationship to God."

We trust the wrong voices. Isaiah captures this:

All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned everyone to his own way. (Isaiah 53:6)

Instead of trusting the shepherd and following where God leads, we easily trust other voices, other opinions, other paths. We make the mistake of believing that our happiness depends on everyone else's opinion of us.

Jesus Offers a Different Yoke

In a world constantly tired and struggling, Jesus says:

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matthew 11:28-29)

He's not offering a nap. He's offering a fundamentally different way of living.

We start out happy as children because we don't care what others think. We become less happy the more we believe the lie that our happiness depends on everyone else's opinion. And we become happy again when we finally stop caring about that approval and return to trusting God's voice.

The solution Jesus offers is to remove the burden of striving and replace it with trust in His voice. Instead of getting obsessed with what everybody thinks, we trust the voice of our shepherd.

Understanding Healthy Boundaries with Others' Opinions

Now, this doesn't mean all other opinions don't matter. Your spouse's opinion matters. The guidance of godly people in your life matters. Accountability and correction from spiritual authority matters. But here's the key difference: those opinions matter, but they don't carry the same weight as Jesus.

He is the voice we listen to. He is the one we follow. He is the one we chase.

What Sheep Need to Rest

Philip Keller, a lifelong shepherd, wrote A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23. He identified four specific things sheep need in order to lie down and rest:

1. Freedom from Fear

Sheep are naturally fearful, constantly looking for danger. They can't rest while afraid. The same is true for us. When anxiety and fear grip us, rest eludes us. How do we remove fear? By increasing trust. The more we trust the shepherd, the less fear defines us, owns us, and wrecks our life.

But here's the paradox: on one hand, the solution is easy—trust more. On the other hand, it's really hard, because growing in faith and trust in Jesus isn't a one-time decision; it's a continual pursuit.

2. Freedom from Friction with Others

If sheep are fighting with each other, they can't rest. The shepherd must intervene. Similarly, relationship conflicts keep us awake at night. We replay conversations from years ago because we care so deeply about what others think. The solution is valuing our shepherd more than we value these other relationships, and allowing the shepherd to heal those relationships through the power of the Holy Spirit.

3. Freedom from Distracting Pests

Distractions keep sheep from resting. Our biggest distraction today? Our phones. We're so tuned into these devices that we're constantly distracted from being present with God and with the people we love.

4. Basic Needs Met

Sheep need to know their hunger will be satisfied. For most of us, the issue isn't meeting basic needs—it's the hunger for more. We think, "If I just have this, then I'll be happy. And this. And this." But that hunger is never-ending.

The truth is simpler: "My basic needs are met today. Therefore, I can rest and relax in God because I have comfort, faith, and trust in Him."

A Cautionary Tale

There's a true story from Japan in December 2023 that illustrates this perfectly. A man became so desperate to kill a single cockroach in his apartment that he sprayed an entire minute's worth of insecticide, which caused an explosion that damaged his apartment and injured him.

How often does this happen in our lives? We have a fear, anxiety, or challenge—perhaps the thing keeping us awake at night. We try to fix it, but in our desperation, we make it so much worse. Our anxiety doesn't solve the problem; it amplifies it. The solution is always trust. Our shepherd is bigger than any problem we face.

Restoration and the Right Path

Psalm 23:3 tells us:

He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake.

The image of restoration comes from the picture of a cast sheep—a sheep that has fallen on its back and cannot flip itself over. A cast sheep's only hope is the shepherd. The shepherd comes, flips the sheep over, and holds it steady until it regains its bearings.

This is what God wants to do in our lives. We are like cast sheep, flipped upside down by sin and the weight of the world. God our shepherd wants to right us, hold us steady, and put us back on the correct path.

When God restores our soul, He's not just touching our inner feelings—He's restoring our whole selves. The Hebrew word for soul means our entire being, our breathing substance. God wants to restore all of us and then set us on the righteous path.

Trust Through the Zigzag Path

In Exodus 15, Moses—himself a shepherd before becoming Israel's leader—writes about God leading His people out of captivity. He says God led them by steadfast love toward His holy abode, His pasture.

But here's the thing: the path wasn't straight. They zigzagged across the wilderness. Sometimes we feel the same way in our faith journey. We're trying to follow God's path, but we're wondering, "God, why are we going all over the place? Why don't you just take the direct route?"

The answer: God was avoiding danger. The Philistines and other enemies were trying to harm the Israelites. The zigzag path was the safest, healthiest, best path. The sheep don't see the danger ahead; they only see what's directly in front of them. The shepherd has the full view. If the sheep trust the shepherd, they can say, "I'll go wherever you ask me to go."

The same is true for us. Sometimes God's path doesn't make sense. Sometimes our prayers go unanswered in ways we don't understand. In those moments, it comes down to a simple question: Do I trust my shepherd? Is my identity and value connected to other things, or is it connected to Him?

The Power of Family Dinner

Here's a striking fact: research shows that one activity is a better predictor of long-term health, happiness, and success in children than any other single factor. That activity is family dinner.

Why? Because family dinner creates a space where a child connects and relates in a way that helps them identify their success and well-being in relationship with their parents, not in external achievements. They develop a healthier, grounded identity because they experience unconditional love.

A healthy parent who loves their child unconditionally says, "You can't do anything that will make me love you more than I love you right now. You don't have to achieve or accomplish. Just being who you are, I love you."

The closest thing we experience in this life to God's love is this kind of unconditional parental love. And the same truth applies to our relationship with God: We can't do anything to make Him love us more than He already does. Once we truly believe this, how much easier it becomes to rest in today, in right now.

The Restored Life Available Today

Verse 2 and 3 of Psalm 23 paint a beautiful picture. God is saying He wants to give us a restored soul and a right path, green pastures and still waters. This promise is available to us today, not in the future. It's for right now, whatever you're going through.

The way we experience this is primarily through trust—trusting our shepherd's voice above any and all other voices.

The 45-year-old who's unhappy still buys into the lie: "I'll be happier once I accomplish these things." The 65-year-old says, "I've been there. I've done that. It doesn't work." Instead, they take captive each precious moment and pour into what truly matters.

You don't have to wait 20 more years to experience that freedom. You can start today by asking yourself: Whose voice am I listening to? Whose approval am I chasing? Or am I willing to trust my shepherd?