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Part 2 of 8'The Presence of God' Series
Presence of God series
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Connected by scripture or shared themes.
Part 2 of 8'The Presence of God' Series
Presence of God series
Continue exploring
Connected by scripture or shared themes.
Some of you have stopped believing you can be free. The Lord came to remind you today that freedom is yours—you just have to want it. Jesus already paid for it. Sin can't hold you. That struggle can't keep you. That bondage can't keep its hands on you. Jesus already paid for your freedom. The debt is completely paid. You're free. You're innocent. You're clean. And you're released. You can choose freedom.
Today's message is not just encouraging or inspirational—it's meant to challenge us to change and become more like Jesus. We're continuing in the "Presence of God" series with the theme: Don't Stay Where You Started.
You may have come to God in one place, but it's not okay for you to hang out in that place forever. God is expecting you to grow. God is expecting you to change. Some of you are experiencing growing pains right now. When you're growing, it causes pain, but it's the pain of God stretching your capacity to pour more into you.
I want to look at Luke 2:51-52, a passage the church doesn't preach on enough. It says:
"Then he went down with them to Nazareth and was obedient to them. But his mother treasured all these things in her heart. And Jesus grew in wisdom, stature, and in favor with God and in favor with man."
What I love about this verse is that it shows Jesus was obedient to his earthly parents despite their imperfections. It's easy to say you're obedient to the Father because you can't see God. But Jesus was obedient to the parents God gave him on this earth.
Even though the Bible is short about Jesus's childhood, it's not silent about it. There are critical things in Jesus's childhood that we need to lean into. Most of the time, we have Christmas—where Jesus was born—and then Easter—where Jesus died. But there's not much about what happened to Jesus those 30 years before he started his ministry.
Jesus was alive on earth for 30 years before he started his ministry. The Bible shows us what we call holistic maturity: being able to grow like Jesus in every way, not just in spiritual understanding. You have to grow in every area of your life.
The word "grew" in Greek means continual development. It's not like going to school, taking a class, graduating, and then being done. Jesus stayed in this space of continual growth. He didn't just appear fully formed in knowledge.
When we think of Jesus, we often go right to Jesus on the cross and forget: What did you have to live through before you even got there? What did you have to do? How much did you have to grow before God trusted you with the world's sins?
When we start the story of Jesus at the cross, we rob him of the life he lived worthy of humanity's salvation. We miss the humanity of Christ—where he moved, grew, learned, and experienced life the same way that we do.
Jesus grew through stages in life. Before he got to the place where God used him at 30 years old, he was in a process of growing through different stages. It's okay to say that you're in process because Jesus was too. You're not just going to wake up tomorrow and be the anointed person and everything God told you to be. That's not how it works.
Every single day, you have to pick up your cross and follow him. Every single day you have to kill something. You have to drop something that doesn't look like Jesus. And it may be frustrating and tiring, but it's a daily journey. Jesus went through this process every day of becoming more like what God wanted him to be.
His growth reflects a self-limitation—he voluntarily submitted his divine nature to the human experience. Jesus did not live on the earth as God on earth. Everything he experienced, the Bible says he experienced it as a man. He died as a man, bled as a man, cried as a man, and rose as a God. When Jesus was on earth, he followed every human limitation. He did everything that we have to do. The Bible says he was tempted and tested and hurt in every single area the same way you and I would.
Why? Because he cannot carry our sins and burdens if he doesn't know what they feel like. He has to experience them.
Matthew 4:1 says: "Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil."
Jesus had to be led, and Jesus had to be tempted—two critical parts of human experience. Part of your growth cycle in Christ is learning how to be led and how to face temptation. You have to learn how to be led. Some of you don't like anybody leading you, but you cannot live a life for God on your own terms. If you're going to submit your life to God, he can't just be God. He has to be Lord of your life.
In John 5:19, Jesus explains: "I tell you the truth, the son of man can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the father doing. And whatever the father does, the son also does."
Jesus says: "I'm the Son, but in my humanity, I can't do anything on my own. Everything that I'm doing is because God is leading me." Adopt this into your life because I promise you, it's going to save you from all of the trauma and pain the enemy intends to bring to you.
Start saying: "God, you lead me. Who's supposed to be in my life? You lead me. Who's supposed to be in my journey? God, you show me. Am I looking like you in my job? Am I looking like you in my family? Am I being led by you with my money? Everything that I do, I want to make sure that you're leading me, God, because I have history with myself. When I lead myself, I always find myself in a place I don't want to be."
We also see that Jesus had to be tempted just like we have to be tempted. First Peter 4:12-13 says:
"Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come to test you as though something strange has happened to you."
Every single Sunday, somebody comes to me in the hallway shocked that they're going through something. They say, "Pastor, I just got baptized and gave my life to Christ, and then the enemy started fighting me." And I say, "Yes, that's the way it works."
The Bible says: Why are you surprised that Satan is doing satanic stuff? You can't wake up and be shocked that the enemy doesn't like you every day. It's like people who live in Wisconsin their whole life and still get shocked in December that it's cold. Why are you still shocked? You've been here 50 years. You should know what the weather is.
We shouldn't be shocked that the enemy doesn't like us. Guess what? We don't like him either. That's my opponent. That's my enemy. I want him to die and burn forever. And because we're not on the same team, there's going to be warfare. This is normal.
The verse continues: "Don't think it's strange, but rejoice in as much as you partake in Christ's sufferings."
It says it's not a reason to be sad. It's a reason to rejoice. When I'm going through, it doesn't mean I'm doing something wrong. It means I'm doing something right. It means the enemy is afraid of me now. Because when I was living for him, he didn't worry about me. But when I switched sides and started living for God, he started getting nervous. A kid in purpose is a dangerous kid. A kid in obedience is a dangerous kid. A kid in submission is dangerous to the enemy.
Jesus grew mentally and emotionally. Wisdom is not just knowledge, but the skillful application of truth and understanding with real-life results. You're not wise because you know a lot of information. You're wise when your life reflects the information you know.
I know a lot of people that know a bunch of Bible verses, but their life doesn't look like it. I know a bunch of people who were raised in church, but the church never got inside them. I know a bunch of people that know the name of Jesus, but don't know the person of Jesus. It's not about how many verses you know. It's how many verses can you live.
Jesus grew intellectually. Jesus grew spiritually. Jesus grew in emotional intelligence. He wasn't just spiritual—he grew in emotional intelligence. Jesus knew how to talk to people. You can't just say, "Well, I'm saved. It's just me and God." You have to learn how to talk to people. You have to learn how to have emotional intelligence. Some things aren't for you to say. You shouldn't be in everybody's situation offering all the solutions. Sometimes you have to say, "Hey, that's not my business. I love you. God bless you. I'm praying for you."
This wasn't divine omniscience. When we talk about omniscience, it means all-knowing. Jesus wasn't born all-knowing. He had to cultivate and grow his wisdom. He wasn't four years old quoting the chronicles. He wasn't a math genius. The Bible says he was 12 in the temple asking questions, listening, comprehending.
Jesus gave up all of his God abilities to be fully man. Philippians 2:7 says: "Instead he gave up his divine privileges and took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being."
He didn't get any unfair advantages. When he bled, it felt the same as when you bleed. When he cried, it felt the same as when you cried. When he was hurting and betrayed, he felt what you felt. So he knows how to cover you when you feel it. He knows how to keep you when you're going through.
Wisdom is required in order to really be a man of God and a woman of God. You need wisdom in every part of your life. James 1:5 says: "Ask for wisdom."
Wisdom is about God—how and when do I use the information you've given to me? How do I process and become it? You need wisdom in everything that God tells you to do. Even things like giving.
Tithing requires wisdom. It's hard for me to put God first if nothing else in my life is in order. If everything is just thrown into one bucket, you can't say, "Well, I put God first," when nothing else has order. God is in there trying to find his way in the middle of the chaos you call life.
You can only have a number one if you know numbers 2 through 10. But if you don't know numbers 2 through 10, then God is not first. He's just in there somewhere.
You cannot give God 10% if you don't have a budget. You don't know where your money's going. You just kick it. Some of you just get paid and do stuff without planning anything. The Bible says, "How can you build unless you first sit down and count up the cost if you have enough to build?"
Some of us get paid and before the money hits our account, we're already spending it. I challenge you to create a budget and review your expenses. You might be shocked at where your money goes. All while telling God you don't have enough.
If you go and spend $11 every day at Starbucks, you spend $55 Monday through Friday. You spend $220 this month. You spend $2,400 this year on Starbucks while telling God, "If I just had a little bit extra money, I sure would give."
But if you create a budget, maybe you'll start looking at your life and saying, "I do have money to do the things I need to do." The problem is you didn't have a plan and you didn't have wisdom. The Bible says, "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge"—for what they don't know.
My people are destroyed because nobody told us to plan. Nobody told us to budget. We just keep asking for 10%. But what do you do with the 90%? Maybe if you stop splurging and create a bucket, you can say, "God, give me wisdom. God, show me how to steward my finances because I can never be a millionaire if I don't know what to do with a few thousand."
Money can't burn through your hands every time you touch it. Some of you are rich in tax season and poor by summer. Because the moment the money hits, it's gone. I'm saying this because I love you. I've been there.
Healthy relationships require wisdom as well. A man who lacks wisdom thinks vulnerability is weakness.
Being vulnerable with your wife doesn't mean you're weak. You can say, "Hey, I didn't like that. Maybe this bothered my emotions." Vulnerability and openness don't mean weakness. So many times the culture expects men to be stronger than they are and to hold everything in, to carry the world on our shoulders. We have men hurting and dying and bleeding internally, but because everybody keeps saying vulnerability is soft, men try to be strong and they're crumbling on the inside. That's not what God told you to do.
The Bible says when I'm weak, that's when I'm most strong. You can admit: "I'm not good today. I'm not great. I need help. I'm struggling." You don't have to die to keep someone else's narrative. You can be real about what you're going through.
A woman who lacks wisdom thinks submission is oppression.
Do I have to listen to everything he says? What about what I feel? We struggle. We think that choosing to be quiet means losing our voice. That's not the truth. The Bible talks about knowing when to speak and knowing when to be quiet. It's about knowing how to use wisdom and how to submit.
Anybody who isn't submitted is a dangerous person. Even me as a pastor—if I'm not submitted, you wouldn't want to be under somebody who isn't submitted to something greater than himself. If he's not submitted, he's arrogant and pushing his own will.
Submission is power, not oppression.
Jesus grew physically. He grew in age and maturity. Jesus had a life of growth. He didn't just grow in spiritual things. He grew in every area of his life. Jesus developed physically just like us. He fully participated in the human experience in every way.
Jesus had to honor his body and give his body to God.
First Corinthians 6:19-20 says:
"Don't you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself. For God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body."
You must honor God with your body. Don't be so spiritual that you neglect your physical well-being.
I grew up in church. People were so spiritual and they were dying because they weren't taking care of their body. This isn't about body shaming. I'm talking about health. I went to church and the pastor was so big he couldn't stand to preach. He had to sit and speak. And then when a health scare came up, the church acted shocked. But we all saw that and nobody said anything.
Yes, my spirit has to be clean, but I have to work on my body as well. I'm not saying you have to be in the gym trying to be fit on Instagram. I'm saying you don't have to be eating fried chicken and yams at midnight. You're not that hungry. You can take care of your well-being.
If something goes wrong, as a pastor, I'm one of the first ones who believes in miracles. I will pray. I believe that heaven will respond. But can you just hear me? Does God have to respond to someone who disobeyed his word? If God says, "Honor me with your body," and you disrespect your temple every day by what you put in it, and then you say, "Oh, God, I need you to heal me"—but God said, "It was your disobedience that made you sick."
Growth should not be compartmentalized. Jesus believers have to grow in every single area—not just the ones we approve of or the ones popular in church. Not just speaking in tongues and laying hands. Not just in deliverance and praying for others. Not just in saying, "I came out of sin."
First Corinthians 13:11 says: "When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things."
The childish things don't just leave. You have to put them away. I've seen somebody 50 years old still acting like a child. Why? Because childish ways don't leave. You have to make a choice to put them down.
Ask yourself: Are there moments where your response doesn't match the maturity you desire to walk in?
Is it your temper? Your temper turns you back into a child. You get mad quick and for no reason. Everybody in the room is trying to figure out what happened. Are we 10 or 40? Which one are we?
Are you shutting down when you get angry? You don't want to talk for days. Just walking past one another in the house. "You fine? I'm fine. You fine. I'm fine. You're not fine." You're shutting down like a child. That was okay in elementary school. But as an adult, you can't just shut down.
Do you still get violent when you're upset? You're grown. You shouldn't still be punching walls and throwing stuff. That was cool when you were five, but you shouldn't be doing it now at 50.
Maybe it's unforgiveness. You're still holding grudges like it's the cafeteria in school. "Come on, sit with us. We don't talk to them." That's okay when you're young, but when you're grown, it still takes you this long to forgive people. People be old and still holding grudges. And it's like you're going to die holding on to that.
At some point, you have to put away childish things.
Some of you overspend even when you know you lack the resources. You know you're trying to figure out how to pay rent and your car payment, and still you buy the Nikes that dropped this Friday. You're on Fashion Nova and there was a sale, so you had to get it 50% off. You didn't have to get that. You have to pay your rent though.
Gossip or rumors—spreading people's business. I still don't understand why we're still talking about business that isn't ours. You heard what happened? No, I made it my business to unhear. I don't want to hear anything. I don't want to hear what happened.
Maybe you're in a place of needing constant validation. You need people to like you and you're mad like they went out to eat and didn't invite you. You're hurt. I don't know what it is. I extend love. I extend hope. They didn't want to invite you. Maybe you talk too much. Maybe you eat too much. Maybe you don't pay your part of the bill. I don't know. They don't want a temp. They want you to leave.
Some of you are older and still need the constant validation of a child. When we were young, we all needed that. We'd play house. "You be the mama. You be the daddy." And I'd be hurt because nobody wanted me to be the dad. Nobody wanted me. They'd say, "Kid, you be the dog." I don't want to be the dog. Why do I always have to be the pet? Why can't I be the husband?
Sometimes we're laughing at the kid, but you're crying the same way. Everybody else gets what they want and everybody else gets married and everybody else—God, how come it's not my turn? You're needing people to choose you in order for you to love yourself.
And it's okay when you felt that as a child. I get it because you weren't mature enough to understand that you're lovable and beautiful and handsome all because God created you. But at the age you are today, maybe you should be at the point of saying, "God, why is it that I still don't love myself enough to disregard others that don't choose me?"
All of these things point to signs of emotional immaturity that need to be surrendered to God. I need to surrender these areas to God.
The Greek word for favor is charis, which is where we get the word charismatic or charisma. It means grace, approval, favor, or relational goodwill. Jesus lived in obedience and aligned with God's will.
Matthew 17:5-6 says:
"While he was standing there speaking a bright cloud covered them and a voice from the cloud said, 'This is my son whom I love. With him I am well pleased. Listen to him.' And when the disciples heard this, they fell face down to the ground and were terrified."
I need you to catch this: Jesus grew into this moment. God could have said this when Jesus was five. Could have said it when he was 10, 15, 20. But no, God waited until 30 years of maturity. Jesus proved to him, "God, I can be faithful and wait on you."
It was after him being faithful for 30 years that God broke the heavens, opened the clouds, and said, "This is my son in whom I am well pleased."
Jesus spent 30 years preparing for a three-year ministry. We think it's the other way. We want to prepare for three and work for 30. We just jump. "Okay, I got saved today. In six months, I want to be preaching." Wait. God is saying, "Wait. You're going to jump out in something and you're not ready to handle the weight that comes with it."
For believers, spiritual growth is ongoing. It means every area all the time. Always working on ourselves. It's not just about stopping at sin. Stopping sin doesn't mean God is done. Stopping sin is the elementary stuff. That's the very beginning of everything.
If we teach only about stopping sin, you will be focused on sin and you will never find purpose. It's not just about stopping sin. You can stop sinning and still not reflect God's nature and still not look like God because you're weak in every other area.
I meet people like this all the time. Born and raised in church. Holy but horrible people. They know scripture. They can pray. But ask them to love their neighbor, they can't find it. Ask them to be kind to people in the church, they can't find it. They say, "Oh, but I'm sanctified."
Sanctification is not just about holiness. It's about becoming like God in every way. It's about being set apart from the world. It's about being set apart from the cruelty and nastiness of the world and being the loving, peace, shalom presence of God. Looking like God in every way.
Jesus thought it was important to grow in favor with people. And you can't just love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. You also have to love your neighbor. And that's equal to the first commandment.
Jesus shows us that true favor is balanced. Some people seek favor with man but neglect favor with God. While others seek favor with God but alienate everyone else. "Well, as long as I got God, I'm good." But that's not what the Bible says. The Bible says you're supposed to love people.
Jesus modeled a life that loved God and served people. Love God with all my heart. I'm going to please God with all my heart, but I'm going to serve people as well. Because I cannot have an assignment and not serve people within it.
If you're a Christian, you have to grow in every area. Especially if you're a leader, you have to grow in every area. A ministry gift with no wisdom, broken character, or unhealthy relationships will be ineffective. Even if you have favor from God, people say, "Well, I got favor." But favor isn't arbitrary.
Favor comes from obedience to God. Jesus grew in favor with God through obedience. Favor with man through walking in righteousness. If you have favor on your life, it means you had to be obedient when everybody else is stumbling, failing, and walking away. You had to be consistent. That is how you get favor on your life.
You have to ask yourself: What does it look like for me to be a man of God, woman of God, but yet people don't like being around me or people don't trust me? Don't tell me that God trusts you with his people if people don't trust you.
You can't preach to people who don't trust you because they're like, "I want to hear your message, but the problem is I can't see past your life." Yeah, you got a gift, but I can't get to your gift because your character is blocking me.
I got three questions that I wish somebody would have given me when I was young:
When you're gifted and God is in you and the presence of God is in you, that's supposed to be a draw. People chase Jesus because of what he carried. He carried an anointing. He carried love. He carried grace. And people wanted to be connected to that.
You cannot be a saint and have no friends. This is flawed theology that we don't teach what friendship is in church. We talk about the enemy, but in the church, you should have some friends. In life, you should have some friends.
Proverbs 17:17 says: "A friend is always loyal and a brother is born to help in the time of need."
A friend is always—underline that word always—loyal. When I looked at this, I said: I don't have a lot of friends because if you pick and choose when you're going to be loyal to me, you're not a friend. It doesn't mean you're my enemy. It doesn't mean I'm mad at you. It just means I know which category to put you in.
Friends don't pick and choose when they show up for me. Friends show up for me all the time, even when it's sometimes inconvenient. I need real friends in my life for the way that my life is wired. I don't need people who are with me when it's popping, when it's cracking, and things are good. I need friends who are with me saying, "Hey, it doesn't matter what's happening, bro. I got you."
Real friendship doesn't mean agreement either. Real friendship means honesty and accountability. I can be your real friend even when I don't agree with you. As a matter of fact, the main time you need me to be a real friend is when I don't agree with you. That's when you need somebody to come tell you the truth.
You need somebody to say, "Hey, bro, you're acting crazy. Hey, sis, you're tripping. You need to step back. Go home and chill."
Proverbs 27:6 says: "Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses of an enemy."
When you're a sincere friend, it's better to have a friend who loves you and says, "Hey, if something needs to be cut off me, cut me. If I'm too comfortable, cut it off. Sometimes you need a real friend that can come and tell you: You are your own problem, bro. Hey, sis, they're not hating on you. It's the truth. They're talking about you. Hey, did they lie?
It cuts. It hurts. It's uncomfortable. But I would rather have a friend who can tell me the truth than have an enemy who will lie to me.
We see Jesus growing in every area. Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and in favor with man. Some of you are frustrated not because you're failing, but because you're still forming. You're like Jesus.
Jesus didn't just get there. It took him 30 years to get there.
For some of you, the reason your ministry can't start quick is because it's going to be too significant to rush. Sometimes when God's going to do something big inside of you, God has to take more time preparing you so that you're structured to carry the weight of what's going to be on your shoulders.
Some of you are still forming. You're still growing. And your growth feels like obscurity. Your growth feels slow. Your growth feels like you're being overlooked. But God is still working underground before he reveals you above ground. God is still working on your roots before he reveals your fruit.
If you're in that place and you're like, "Pastor, I'm kind of confused. I don't know what God is doing," hey, you're in good company. Sometimes God keeps things slow, but he knows he's going to reveal you into something big in the end.
The deeper question to ask yourself is: What's broken in me that makes waiting feel unbearable?
When I looked at my life, I realized I was always rushing. I had to pause and say, "Ken, why are you always rushing?" Maybe it's because I was addicted to success. Success made me feel better about myself. Maybe it's because I didn't believe good things about me. Maybe what I thought people were saying was what I actually believed about myself.
The reason some of us can't rush is because we think we're trying to prove people wrong. When really, we're trying to prove the voice in our head wrong. But when you can step back and say, "God, I don't want to rush myself out of your will. I want to be still and know that you're God. God, give me the patience and help me to deal with what's broken so that I can wait on you."
Many of us are like Jesus. We're in a stage where we're not stuck. We're not failing. We're forming.
Some of you have stopped believing you can be free. The Lord came to remind you today that freedom is yours—you just have to want it. Jesus already paid for it. Sin can't hold you. That struggle can't keep you. That bondage can't keep its hands on you. Jesus already paid for your freedom. The debt is completely paid. You're free. You're innocent. You're clean. And you're released. You can choose freedom.
Today's message is not just encouraging or inspirational—it's meant to challenge us to change and become more like Jesus. We're continuing in the "Presence of God" series with the theme: Don't Stay Where You Started.
You may have come to God in one place, but it's not okay for you to hang out in that place forever. God is expecting you to grow. God is expecting you to change. Some of you are experiencing growing pains right now. When you're growing, it causes pain, but it's the pain of God stretching your capacity to pour more into you.
I want to look at Luke 2:51-52, a passage the church doesn't preach on enough. It says:
"Then he went down with them to Nazareth and was obedient to them. But his mother treasured all these things in her heart. And Jesus grew in wisdom, stature, and in favor with God and in favor with man."
What I love about this verse is that it shows Jesus was obedient to his earthly parents despite their imperfections. It's easy to say you're obedient to the Father because you can't see God. But Jesus was obedient to the parents God gave him on this earth.
Even though the Bible is short about Jesus's childhood, it's not silent about it. There are critical things in Jesus's childhood that we need to lean into. Most of the time, we have Christmas—where Jesus was born—and then Easter—where Jesus died. But there's not much about what happened to Jesus those 30 years before he started his ministry.
Jesus was alive on earth for 30 years before he started his ministry. The Bible shows us what we call holistic maturity: being able to grow like Jesus in every way, not just in spiritual understanding. You have to grow in every area of your life.
The word "grew" in Greek means continual development. It's not like going to school, taking a class, graduating, and then being done. Jesus stayed in this space of continual growth. He didn't just appear fully formed in knowledge.
When we think of Jesus, we often go right to Jesus on the cross and forget: What did you have to live through before you even got there? What did you have to do? How much did you have to grow before God trusted you with the world's sins?
When we start the story of Jesus at the cross, we rob him of the life he lived worthy of humanity's salvation. We miss the humanity of Christ—where he moved, grew, learned, and experienced life the same way that we do.
Jesus grew through stages in life. Before he got to the place where God used him at 30 years old, he was in a process of growing through different stages. It's okay to say that you're in process because Jesus was too. You're not just going to wake up tomorrow and be the anointed person and everything God told you to be. That's not how it works.
Every single day, you have to pick up your cross and follow him. Every single day you have to kill something. You have to drop something that doesn't look like Jesus. And it may be frustrating and tiring, but it's a daily journey. Jesus went through this process every day of becoming more like what God wanted him to be.
His growth reflects a self-limitation—he voluntarily submitted his divine nature to the human experience. Jesus did not live on the earth as God on earth. Everything he experienced, the Bible says he experienced it as a man. He died as a man, bled as a man, cried as a man, and rose as a God. When Jesus was on earth, he followed every human limitation. He did everything that we have to do. The Bible says he was tempted and tested and hurt in every single area the same way you and I would.
Why? Because he cannot carry our sins and burdens if he doesn't know what they feel like. He has to experience them.
Matthew 4:1 says: "Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil."
Jesus had to be led, and Jesus had to be tempted—two critical parts of human experience. Part of your growth cycle in Christ is learning how to be led and how to face temptation. You have to learn how to be led. Some of you don't like anybody leading you, but you cannot live a life for God on your own terms. If you're going to submit your life to God, he can't just be God. He has to be Lord of your life.
In John 5:19, Jesus explains: "I tell you the truth, the son of man can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the father doing. And whatever the father does, the son also does."
Jesus says: "I'm the Son, but in my humanity, I can't do anything on my own. Everything that I'm doing is because God is leading me." Adopt this into your life because I promise you, it's going to save you from all of the trauma and pain the enemy intends to bring to you.
Start saying: "God, you lead me. Who's supposed to be in my life? You lead me. Who's supposed to be in my journey? God, you show me. Am I looking like you in my job? Am I looking like you in my family? Am I being led by you with my money? Everything that I do, I want to make sure that you're leading me, God, because I have history with myself. When I lead myself, I always find myself in a place I don't want to be."
We also see that Jesus had to be tempted just like we have to be tempted. First Peter 4:12-13 says:
"Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come to test you as though something strange has happened to you."
Every single Sunday, somebody comes to me in the hallway shocked that they're going through something. They say, "Pastor, I just got baptized and gave my life to Christ, and then the enemy started fighting me." And I say, "Yes, that's the way it works."
The Bible says: Why are you surprised that Satan is doing satanic stuff? You can't wake up and be shocked that the enemy doesn't like you every day. It's like people who live in Wisconsin their whole life and still get shocked in December that it's cold. Why are you still shocked? You've been here 50 years. You should know what the weather is.
We shouldn't be shocked that the enemy doesn't like us. Guess what? We don't like him either. That's my opponent. That's my enemy. I want him to die and burn forever. And because we're not on the same team, there's going to be warfare. This is normal.
The verse continues: "Don't think it's strange, but rejoice in as much as you partake in Christ's sufferings."
It says it's not a reason to be sad. It's a reason to rejoice. When I'm going through, it doesn't mean I'm doing something wrong. It means I'm doing something right. It means the enemy is afraid of me now. Because when I was living for him, he didn't worry about me. But when I switched sides and started living for God, he started getting nervous. A kid in purpose is a dangerous kid. A kid in obedience is a dangerous kid. A kid in submission is dangerous to the enemy.
Jesus grew mentally and emotionally. Wisdom is not just knowledge, but the skillful application of truth and understanding with real-life results. You're not wise because you know a lot of information. You're wise when your life reflects the information you know.
I know a lot of people that know a bunch of Bible verses, but their life doesn't look like it. I know a bunch of people who were raised in church, but the church never got inside them. I know a bunch of people that know the name of Jesus, but don't know the person of Jesus. It's not about how many verses you know. It's how many verses can you live.
Jesus grew intellectually. Jesus grew spiritually. Jesus grew in emotional intelligence. He wasn't just spiritual—he grew in emotional intelligence. Jesus knew how to talk to people. You can't just say, "Well, I'm saved. It's just me and God." You have to learn how to talk to people. You have to learn how to have emotional intelligence. Some things aren't for you to say. You shouldn't be in everybody's situation offering all the solutions. Sometimes you have to say, "Hey, that's not my business. I love you. God bless you. I'm praying for you."
This wasn't divine omniscience. When we talk about omniscience, it means all-knowing. Jesus wasn't born all-knowing. He had to cultivate and grow his wisdom. He wasn't four years old quoting the chronicles. He wasn't a math genius. The Bible says he was 12 in the temple asking questions, listening, comprehending.
Jesus gave up all of his God abilities to be fully man. Philippians 2:7 says: "Instead he gave up his divine privileges and took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being."
He didn't get any unfair advantages. When he bled, it felt the same as when you bleed. When he cried, it felt the same as when you cried. When he was hurting and betrayed, he felt what you felt. So he knows how to cover you when you feel it. He knows how to keep you when you're going through.
Wisdom is required in order to really be a man of God and a woman of God. You need wisdom in every part of your life. James 1:5 says: "Ask for wisdom."
Wisdom is about God—how and when do I use the information you've given to me? How do I process and become it? You need wisdom in everything that God tells you to do. Even things like giving.
Tithing requires wisdom. It's hard for me to put God first if nothing else in my life is in order. If everything is just thrown into one bucket, you can't say, "Well, I put God first," when nothing else has order. God is in there trying to find his way in the middle of the chaos you call life.
You can only have a number one if you know numbers 2 through 10. But if you don't know numbers 2 through 10, then God is not first. He's just in there somewhere.
You cannot give God 10% if you don't have a budget. You don't know where your money's going. You just kick it. Some of you just get paid and do stuff without planning anything. The Bible says, "How can you build unless you first sit down and count up the cost if you have enough to build?"
Some of us get paid and before the money hits our account, we're already spending it. I challenge you to create a budget and review your expenses. You might be shocked at where your money goes. All while telling God you don't have enough.
If you go and spend $11 every day at Starbucks, you spend $55 Monday through Friday. You spend $220 this month. You spend $2,400 this year on Starbucks while telling God, "If I just had a little bit extra money, I sure would give."
But if you create a budget, maybe you'll start looking at your life and saying, "I do have money to do the things I need to do." The problem is you didn't have a plan and you didn't have wisdom. The Bible says, "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge"—for what they don't know.
My people are destroyed because nobody told us to plan. Nobody told us to budget. We just keep asking for 10%. But what do you do with the 90%? Maybe if you stop splurging and create a bucket, you can say, "God, give me wisdom. God, show me how to steward my finances because I can never be a millionaire if I don't know what to do with a few thousand."
Money can't burn through your hands every time you touch it. Some of you are rich in tax season and poor by summer. Because the moment the money hits, it's gone. I'm saying this because I love you. I've been there.
Healthy relationships require wisdom as well. A man who lacks wisdom thinks vulnerability is weakness.
Being vulnerable with your wife doesn't mean you're weak. You can say, "Hey, I didn't like that. Maybe this bothered my emotions." Vulnerability and openness don't mean weakness. So many times the culture expects men to be stronger than they are and to hold everything in, to carry the world on our shoulders. We have men hurting and dying and bleeding internally, but because everybody keeps saying vulnerability is soft, men try to be strong and they're crumbling on the inside. That's not what God told you to do.
The Bible says when I'm weak, that's when I'm most strong. You can admit: "I'm not good today. I'm not great. I need help. I'm struggling." You don't have to die to keep someone else's narrative. You can be real about what you're going through.
A woman who lacks wisdom thinks submission is oppression.
Do I have to listen to everything he says? What about what I feel? We struggle. We think that choosing to be quiet means losing our voice. That's not the truth. The Bible talks about knowing when to speak and knowing when to be quiet. It's about knowing how to use wisdom and how to submit.
Anybody who isn't submitted is a dangerous person. Even me as a pastor—if I'm not submitted, you wouldn't want to be under somebody who isn't submitted to something greater than himself. If he's not submitted, he's arrogant and pushing his own will.
Submission is power, not oppression.
Jesus grew physically. He grew in age and maturity. Jesus had a life of growth. He didn't just grow in spiritual things. He grew in every area of his life. Jesus developed physically just like us. He fully participated in the human experience in every way.
Jesus had to honor his body and give his body to God.
First Corinthians 6:19-20 says:
"Don't you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself. For God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body."
You must honor God with your body. Don't be so spiritual that you neglect your physical well-being.
I grew up in church. People were so spiritual and they were dying because they weren't taking care of their body. This isn't about body shaming. I'm talking about health. I went to church and the pastor was so big he couldn't stand to preach. He had to sit and speak. And then when a health scare came up, the church acted shocked. But we all saw that and nobody said anything.
Yes, my spirit has to be clean, but I have to work on my body as well. I'm not saying you have to be in the gym trying to be fit on Instagram. I'm saying you don't have to be eating fried chicken and yams at midnight. You're not that hungry. You can take care of your well-being.
If something goes wrong, as a pastor, I'm one of the first ones who believes in miracles. I will pray. I believe that heaven will respond. But can you just hear me? Does God have to respond to someone who disobeyed his word? If God says, "Honor me with your body," and you disrespect your temple every day by what you put in it, and then you say, "Oh, God, I need you to heal me"—but God said, "It was your disobedience that made you sick."
Growth should not be compartmentalized. Jesus believers have to grow in every single area—not just the ones we approve of or the ones popular in church. Not just speaking in tongues and laying hands. Not just in deliverance and praying for others. Not just in saying, "I came out of sin."
First Corinthians 13:11 says: "When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things."
The childish things don't just leave. You have to put them away. I've seen somebody 50 years old still acting like a child. Why? Because childish ways don't leave. You have to make a choice to put them down.
Ask yourself: Are there moments where your response doesn't match the maturity you desire to walk in?
Is it your temper? Your temper turns you back into a child. You get mad quick and for no reason. Everybody in the room is trying to figure out what happened. Are we 10 or 40? Which one are we?
Are you shutting down when you get angry? You don't want to talk for days. Just walking past one another in the house. "You fine? I'm fine. You fine. I'm fine. You're not fine." You're shutting down like a child. That was okay in elementary school. But as an adult, you can't just shut down.
Do you still get violent when you're upset? You're grown. You shouldn't still be punching walls and throwing stuff. That was cool when you were five, but you shouldn't be doing it now at 50.
Maybe it's unforgiveness. You're still holding grudges like it's the cafeteria in school. "Come on, sit with us. We don't talk to them." That's okay when you're young, but when you're grown, it still takes you this long to forgive people. People be old and still holding grudges. And it's like you're going to die holding on to that.
At some point, you have to put away childish things.
Some of you overspend even when you know you lack the resources. You know you're trying to figure out how to pay rent and your car payment, and still you buy the Nikes that dropped this Friday. You're on Fashion Nova and there was a sale, so you had to get it 50% off. You didn't have to get that. You have to pay your rent though.
Gossip or rumors—spreading people's business. I still don't understand why we're still talking about business that isn't ours. You heard what happened? No, I made it my business to unhear. I don't want to hear anything. I don't want to hear what happened.
Maybe you're in a place of needing constant validation. You need people to like you and you're mad like they went out to eat and didn't invite you. You're hurt. I don't know what it is. I extend love. I extend hope. They didn't want to invite you. Maybe you talk too much. Maybe you eat too much. Maybe you don't pay your part of the bill. I don't know. They don't want a temp. They want you to leave.
Some of you are older and still need the constant validation of a child. When we were young, we all needed that. We'd play house. "You be the mama. You be the daddy." And I'd be hurt because nobody wanted me to be the dad. Nobody wanted me. They'd say, "Kid, you be the dog." I don't want to be the dog. Why do I always have to be the pet? Why can't I be the husband?
Sometimes we're laughing at the kid, but you're crying the same way. Everybody else gets what they want and everybody else gets married and everybody else—God, how come it's not my turn? You're needing people to choose you in order for you to love yourself.
And it's okay when you felt that as a child. I get it because you weren't mature enough to understand that you're lovable and beautiful and handsome all because God created you. But at the age you are today, maybe you should be at the point of saying, "God, why is it that I still don't love myself enough to disregard others that don't choose me?"
All of these things point to signs of emotional immaturity that need to be surrendered to God. I need to surrender these areas to God.
The Greek word for favor is charis, which is where we get the word charismatic or charisma. It means grace, approval, favor, or relational goodwill. Jesus lived in obedience and aligned with God's will.
Matthew 17:5-6 says:
"While he was standing there speaking a bright cloud covered them and a voice from the cloud said, 'This is my son whom I love. With him I am well pleased. Listen to him.' And when the disciples heard this, they fell face down to the ground and were terrified."
I need you to catch this: Jesus grew into this moment. God could have said this when Jesus was five. Could have said it when he was 10, 15, 20. But no, God waited until 30 years of maturity. Jesus proved to him, "God, I can be faithful and wait on you."
It was after him being faithful for 30 years that God broke the heavens, opened the clouds, and said, "This is my son in whom I am well pleased."
Jesus spent 30 years preparing for a three-year ministry. We think it's the other way. We want to prepare for three and work for 30. We just jump. "Okay, I got saved today. In six months, I want to be preaching." Wait. God is saying, "Wait. You're going to jump out in something and you're not ready to handle the weight that comes with it."
For believers, spiritual growth is ongoing. It means every area all the time. Always working on ourselves. It's not just about stopping at sin. Stopping sin doesn't mean God is done. Stopping sin is the elementary stuff. That's the very beginning of everything.
If we teach only about stopping sin, you will be focused on sin and you will never find purpose. It's not just about stopping sin. You can stop sinning and still not reflect God's nature and still not look like God because you're weak in every other area.
I meet people like this all the time. Born and raised in church. Holy but horrible people. They know scripture. They can pray. But ask them to love their neighbor, they can't find it. Ask them to be kind to people in the church, they can't find it. They say, "Oh, but I'm sanctified."
Sanctification is not just about holiness. It's about becoming like God in every way. It's about being set apart from the world. It's about being set apart from the cruelty and nastiness of the world and being the loving, peace, shalom presence of God. Looking like God in every way.
Jesus thought it was important to grow in favor with people. And you can't just love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. You also have to love your neighbor. And that's equal to the first commandment.
Jesus shows us that true favor is balanced. Some people seek favor with man but neglect favor with God. While others seek favor with God but alienate everyone else. "Well, as long as I got God, I'm good." But that's not what the Bible says. The Bible says you're supposed to love people.
Jesus modeled a life that loved God and served people. Love God with all my heart. I'm going to please God with all my heart, but I'm going to serve people as well. Because I cannot have an assignment and not serve people within it.
If you're a Christian, you have to grow in every area. Especially if you're a leader, you have to grow in every area. A ministry gift with no wisdom, broken character, or unhealthy relationships will be ineffective. Even if you have favor from God, people say, "Well, I got favor." But favor isn't arbitrary.
Favor comes from obedience to God. Jesus grew in favor with God through obedience. Favor with man through walking in righteousness. If you have favor on your life, it means you had to be obedient when everybody else is stumbling, failing, and walking away. You had to be consistent. That is how you get favor on your life.
You have to ask yourself: What does it look like for me to be a man of God, woman of God, but yet people don't like being around me or people don't trust me? Don't tell me that God trusts you with his people if people don't trust you.
You can't preach to people who don't trust you because they're like, "I want to hear your message, but the problem is I can't see past your life." Yeah, you got a gift, but I can't get to your gift because your character is blocking me.
I got three questions that I wish somebody would have given me when I was young:
When you're gifted and God is in you and the presence of God is in you, that's supposed to be a draw. People chase Jesus because of what he carried. He carried an anointing. He carried love. He carried grace. And people wanted to be connected to that.
You cannot be a saint and have no friends. This is flawed theology that we don't teach what friendship is in church. We talk about the enemy, but in the church, you should have some friends. In life, you should have some friends.
Proverbs 17:17 says: "A friend is always loyal and a brother is born to help in the time of need."
A friend is always—underline that word always—loyal. When I looked at this, I said: I don't have a lot of friends because if you pick and choose when you're going to be loyal to me, you're not a friend. It doesn't mean you're my enemy. It doesn't mean I'm mad at you. It just means I know which category to put you in.
Friends don't pick and choose when they show up for me. Friends show up for me all the time, even when it's sometimes inconvenient. I need real friends in my life for the way that my life is wired. I don't need people who are with me when it's popping, when it's cracking, and things are good. I need friends who are with me saying, "Hey, it doesn't matter what's happening, bro. I got you."
Real friendship doesn't mean agreement either. Real friendship means honesty and accountability. I can be your real friend even when I don't agree with you. As a matter of fact, the main time you need me to be a real friend is when I don't agree with you. That's when you need somebody to come tell you the truth.
You need somebody to say, "Hey, bro, you're acting crazy. Hey, sis, you're tripping. You need to step back. Go home and chill."
Proverbs 27:6 says: "Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses of an enemy."
When you're a sincere friend, it's better to have a friend who loves you and says, "Hey, if something needs to be cut off me, cut me. If I'm too comfortable, cut it off. Sometimes you need a real friend that can come and tell you: You are your own problem, bro. Hey, sis, they're not hating on you. It's the truth. They're talking about you. Hey, did they lie?
It cuts. It hurts. It's uncomfortable. But I would rather have a friend who can tell me the truth than have an enemy who will lie to me.
We see Jesus growing in every area. Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and in favor with man. Some of you are frustrated not because you're failing, but because you're still forming. You're like Jesus.
Jesus didn't just get there. It took him 30 years to get there.
For some of you, the reason your ministry can't start quick is because it's going to be too significant to rush. Sometimes when God's going to do something big inside of you, God has to take more time preparing you so that you're structured to carry the weight of what's going to be on your shoulders.
Some of you are still forming. You're still growing. And your growth feels like obscurity. Your growth feels slow. Your growth feels like you're being overlooked. But God is still working underground before he reveals you above ground. God is still working on your roots before he reveals your fruit.
If you're in that place and you're like, "Pastor, I'm kind of confused. I don't know what God is doing," hey, you're in good company. Sometimes God keeps things slow, but he knows he's going to reveal you into something big in the end.
The deeper question to ask yourself is: What's broken in me that makes waiting feel unbearable?
When I looked at my life, I realized I was always rushing. I had to pause and say, "Ken, why are you always rushing?" Maybe it's because I was addicted to success. Success made me feel better about myself. Maybe it's because I didn't believe good things about me. Maybe what I thought people were saying was what I actually believed about myself.
The reason some of us can't rush is because we think we're trying to prove people wrong. When really, we're trying to prove the voice in our head wrong. But when you can step back and say, "God, I don't want to rush myself out of your will. I want to be still and know that you're God. God, give me the patience and help me to deal with what's broken so that I can wait on you."
Many of us are like Jesus. We're in a stage where we're not stuck. We're not failing. We're forming.
